I'm not a weeping widow

"There are many great guys out there, the ones who don't actually pretend to be cool"

he said

"No don't say that, I'm not really in a place. I don't want to talk about these things to you, it hurts" I said.

No babe, that's not how you talk.

Yeah it hurts hell lot but you're not a widow someone left behind.

Yeah it hurts but I'm not going to sit here aching for you. Not atleast when I catch myself doing that.

I don't want to say it I don't feel it. Especially after a number of guys to this extent or that you resurfaced.

But let me say it as I hurt, let me say it with the least intention to let you go, let me say it consciously not wanting to forget your face.

Hell yeah. There's a man out there, he'll come for me. This time, it would be forever. Hell yeah. He's great, he makes me smile. He makes my heart so warm that there's no space left for else.

Hell yeah. He's on his way.

Hell yeah. He'll pick up the more broken piece.

And yes, I'll tell him the truth. And he'll stand by me.

Hell yeah. I'm a wife. I'm the best. I deserve smiles, I deserve laughter not pain.

Yeah he's on his way. And I won't wait for him to start smiling. Yes I'm broken. Yes you are still there in those cracks.

Yes it hurts. It hurts so bad. I'll smile too. I'll walk. I'll wait, he'll show up.

I will wish and wish now. I am tempted to wish for you and everyone else I love.

But no, I will wish and wish now, only for myself. I know you'll come out of the cracks and peep.

But yeah through the tears, I'll wish and wish for myself. For my man to show up.

I'm not a weeping widow. I'm a wife.

I may be broken but I'm brilliant.