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Writer's pictureShravani Thota

that woman

She glows and it's the doomsday of your heart

You're scared that she'll steal your man, but does she care?

There are junctutures you see, junctutures where you make a choice, you pick a path and walk on it

You claim that you're heart is hammered, you say that the 'right thing to do' wasn't worth it

The world isn't worth it you say

With every hit you play it small

At every turn you walk away

You say you're chill that way

"This is all that I want" you claim

This is enough you say

Is it enough though? Why do you then close your eyes when she's getting slashed on her way?

Why do you pretend to not look when she's fledgling but still making her way

You're so scared, just so scared

Excuses, cowardice,deception and hypocrisy of greatest orders

You are well aware

The emptiness that screams at you every night, the emptiness that kills your sleep

The emptiness that claws at you but you still refuse to move

At every point you have to step forward you step back and hide away

You tell the world it's a cozy blanket and you're happy that way

But are you? You are just scared aren't you?


So the day had come and you were made to stand at the gates

You couldn't dream of anything beyond the gates

There she was in the center, there she was alone

Your stomach is in knots, your heart twitching

You don't want to witness this but you cannot help you're dumbstruck

Frozen you watch and there she burnt

She went through hell

They cut her out, they whipped at her

She refused to give in her eyes still burning

She burnt all down and they all got tired

She rose in all glory like a Phoenix from her ashes

And she quietly walked out, chin up like a queen

You stood there feeling all these feelings

Jealous of her because she reminds you of all the things you could have been?

Does she remind you of a child you slaughtered? Does she remind you of the dreams you buried? Does she remind you of your pure deceit?

You cannot hate her though, you love her, you're proud

You want to learn from her, you want her to watch you grow

But you decide to watch from a distance, you don't want your murky feeling surround her

You're proud, you're in love, you're hurt and you're jealous

You walk back wiping your tears

If not a queen I can be a soldier



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